Sunday, August 16, 2015

Life's a Pitch

Hiya Folks,

Welcome to the freshest, most innovative post about "Saturday" the book you're likely to briefly skim this week.

If you're not exactly sure what "Saturday" the book is, lookie here. If internet ennui has made the thought of clicking another link unbearable, let me summup: "Saturday" is an illustrated book about imagination, creativity, a crappy week, and family. If that sounds more cheesy than Pizza Hut's Mozzerellapocalypse, keep in mind that "Saturday" also involves robots, dinosaurs, aliens, references to "Carrie" and "Bladerunner", Estelle Getty-like old ladies, and some bathroom humor.

"But, Noah, " I hear you ask, "how can you possibly fit all that into just one book?"

Well, I'll tell you: About a decade's worth of elbow grease did the trick. "Saturday" also includes my patented "Work-On-A-Thing-Until-You're-Half-Dead" technology. That, and the fact that the book is big. It's 40 pages jam-packed with lavish illustration, humor, and odd cultural references.

"Where can I get this book, and how soon?"

Well, good news: Soon. No more than a couple of weeks. See, I'm making great progress on a second Kickstarter campaign where I'll be selling the book for the first time ever. All that work and fun and imagination crammed into one place tighter than a Japanese subway at rush hour. And like said subway, even with all that density it still manages to be polite and smell nice.

"Oh, wow! I would pay a billion dollars for a book like that!"

You're in luck, friend, you won't be paying a billion dollars. Or even half a billion. Not a million. Not a hundred thousand or even ten thousand. Not a hundred dollars. No, folks, you can have "Saturday" for just one single payment of $35 dollars during our exclusive upcoming Kickstarter campaign.

I can hear your incredulity, friends. I can hear your guffaws of skepticism. "Oh, come on, Noah, how can you possibly afford to sell the book for $35?"

I can't. That's why I'm running the second Kickstarter campaign to help pay for the printing. Hey, I'm a decent illustrator and a pretty cruddy businessman. Jay-Z said "I'm not a businessman, I'm a business, man." Well, it turns out I'm neither a businessman or a business, man. Which is why I'm selling the book for the low, low price of $35.

But wait, there's more! If you help make the Kickstarter campaign successful, I'll throw in stickers, postcards, posters, and maybe even some other rewards. Look, stickers:

And postcards:

So, stay tuned, folks. All this and more will be yours quick, fast, and in a hurry. And for prices that will make you realize why I buy off-brand ketchup.


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