Sunday, November 30, 2014

All Aboard the Germane Train. Stopping randomly.

Welcome back, strangers!

Did you have a good hiatus?

Things on this end aren't far from where you left them.  I'm still editing the book and looking for agents and publishers.  It's a slow process, but they say slow and steady wins the race (this strategy has never, ever won any race I've ever seen, but whatevs).  I'll keep at it and let you know if there are any developments.

If you're in America and don't work in retail, chances are you either just celebrated Thanksgiving or at least had a couple of days off.  I love Thanksgiving.  It usually means spending time with people I enjoy and eating traditional American foods like Doritos and things that come in casserole form.

Of course, moderation is a bit of a problem for me when it comes to said traditional edibles.  But then again, I live by the mantra: "All things in moderation including moderation", so stuffing my gob until I have the glazed over, lifeless expression of an Alex Trebek wax replica is no biggie.  Other mantras of mine include, but are not exclusive to: "Live free or don't", "Your Mother", "Death before the grave" and "I think I'd better not".

Anyhoo, I ate too much.  I don't know about you, but my food comas tend to last from Thanksgiving Day until around January 2nd.  They also tend to range in severity from "Food Malaise" to "Food Blackout" (one minute you're eating, the next you wake up in another state wearing a Cleveland Browns jacket you've never seen before).  Good food and time off tend only to exacerbate my cravings for both of those things, so between November whatever and January 2nd, my productivity is about as low as my cholesterol is high.  I'm surprised I even have the motivation to type this.

A germane train of thought can be as difficult to grab as a hard boiled egg when your fingers are covered with Crisco.  Where was I?

Oh, yeah, food, family, and "Saturday" edits.  This was the original panel from page 4:

And this is the edited version:


Sorry.  I fell asleep on the keys for a minute.

I'll keep at it and drop in periodically to check in and say hello.  Hope your holidays went/are going/will go well.


Sunday, November 9, 2014

Nose Job

Well, helloooo!

So glad you could make it to the latest episode of the "Saturday" update, which accounts for 24% of your recommended daily allowance of "Saturday" (according to the FDA, or Facetious Drawing Administration).  I've been considering a chewable vitamin that would double that dosage, but I'm just not sure about the legality or morality of such an endeavor.  But it would be snosberry flavored, so...bonus.

So, to fill you in briefly on the book progress: Still editing.

There.  How's that for brevity?  If you want more, continue reading this section.  If not, skip down to the bit with pictures.  Sometimes I think you only want me for my pictures.  Well, let me tell you something, Mister (or Missus): "Saturday" isn't just a pretty book to oggle, it has a brain and a heart.  Not LITERALLY.  That would be super gross.  But, I mean, there are jokes and hopefully some emotions.  I'm getting off track here.  I was supposed to be giving you an update on progress.  I'm editing one page and one panel at a time.  The process is going faster and will, theoretically, continue to speed up as I get further into the book where fewer edits are required.

I'm also still looking for an agent and publisher.  I can't say that's much fun.  It's mostly research followed by brief, polite requests made of very busy people followed by a long, uncomfortable silences.  Like the last time I asked Aunt Agnes for money (pulls at collar in Rodney Dangerfield-esque manner).

Ok: If you were skipping the progress update, jump in here:

There's a reason the edits are going faster lately: More experience.  When I started "Saturday" I thought I knew what I was doing and what I really wanted.  And I did, vaguely.

Think of it like cooking a meal with like, a thousand courses.  When I was making those first courses, I mostly had the recipe but didn't always have the ingredients I needed.  So if I didn't have sugar, sometimes I would just substitute salt.  They're both white and granular, right?  It'll prob be fine, bro.  Suffice it to say, whole courses had to be re-cooked because they were totes grody, as the French would say.

Now the whole meal is pretty much sitting on the table.  Don't worry: Most of it will keep.  There aren't many perishables in the meal (I managed not to reference "Wrecking Ball" or "Farmville" in the book).  Now it's just a matter of looking for and fixing small trouble spots, like dees:

Small changes to Elizabeth's character model.  That's it.  Just some minor face alterations (sounds like something a snooty bully would say just before he/she punches the crud out of you) and bigger hair.  Long, beautiful hair.  Shinin', sheenin', gleamin' flaxin waxin.  Here baby, there mama, everywhere daddy daddy.

So there you go.

Ok, I actually have to go ask Aunt Agnes for money.


Sunday, November 2, 2014

Hawk eyed doofus.


Welcome back to the best post-Halloween, pre-election update of "Saturday" the book you're likely to read.  Ever.  I know that's a bold statement.  The gauntlet has been thrown.  The line in the sand has been drawn (I'll draw just about anywhere on just about anything, so sand is no big deal).  But I stand by my statement.  If you can find a better post about this obscure, unpublished book anywhere today, bring it.

So, a quick update to bring everyone up to "Saturday" speed (or down to it, depending on how fast you were already going): I'm hammering away at the edits and searching for agents and publishers.  I'm still having a pretty good time with the former.  The latter, well, it is what it is.  Which is to say, necessary.  But not as much fun as a barrel full of monkeys.

Have you ever actually thought about how completely NOT fun a barrel full of monkeys would be?  If you're talking about the plastic kind with the loopy arms, fine.  But if you're talking about the real kind?  Dear lord.  Monkeys are really strong, very fast, loud, aggressive, wild animals.  And that's in the open.  Imagine how they'd feel if a bunch of them were stuffed into barrel and sealed up.  Then, anticipating slapstick, 3-stooges like fun, you start to pull the lid off the barrel.

"Oh, boy, this is going to be grea---".  Before you can finish the syllable, the monkeys are out of the barrel.  Like spring snakes.  Spring snakes with big teeth and opposable thumbs that are pretty miffed about being cooped up.

So maybe looking for agents and publishers is actually MORE fun than a barrel full of monkeys (the literal kind).

Anyhoo, here's one of the panels I edited recently:


(New and improved):

India's face needed to be updated from the earlier version.  The new panel is also a little warmer, color-wise.  You might also notice India's gone from left-handed to right-handed.  It's little details like that I'm working my way through.  Gotta have a sharp eye and get up pretty early in the morning to catch tiny things like that.  Most people probably wouldn't even notice.

Guy in my head: "You mean like how you didn't draw the paper in the new panel so India is basically just writing directly onto the desk?"
Me: "Crud."
Guy in my head: "Yeah, you got a real hawk eye for detail."

Seriously, I just noticed that as I was typing this.  I imagine India's expression is the same expression you, dear reader, often have on your face as you slog your way through these posts.  And now that I know I have to go back and edit the edit, I'm right there with you.


P.S.- Go vote.  It's more fun than a barrel full of monkeys.